Monday 25th March 2013

Kids-ism of the day:
Peter: "Clara, you're surreal."
Clara: "Peter, you're an idiot."
Suzy: "Clara, do you know what surreal means?"
Clara "No."
Hari: "I do. It's a painter."

Picture of the day: Sunscreen might have been a good idea.

Hellen's Version

When we arrived on Sunday we'd signed up to an "Owner's Breakfast". We paid a $20 deposit and were told to show up at 9 on today for breakfast and a 60-minute presentation. We showed up at 9, and we left after what was eventually a 3 hour presentation. Brian from Detroit chatted to us as though we were his best friends about our holiday plans and what a wise investment our timeshare was. At the end he tried to persuade us to buy another week. When it was clear we weren't going to he said goodbye with astonishing speed and vanished. I feel a little betrayed.

We had planned to go to the free owner barbecue at the pool for lunch, but breakfast had turned into lunch and we weren't hungry. Instead I took a dip in the very hot poolside jacuzzi and then the very cold pool with Ceri, and dried off in the sun for an hour. We headed back to the apartment when I realised that Ceri was getting sunburnt. She wasn't feeling too well, which I put down to the heat until she was copiously sick all over the lounge floor. A whole roll of kitchen towel and improvised mop later, and Ceri was in our bath being hosed down by her sisters as I discussed the change of plan with Suzy. The intention had been that both families would go to Festival Bay Mall and watch The Croods, but in the end I stayed at home with Ceri.

Ceri was feeling much better and watching My Little Pony videos on my laptop (which has developed an annoying habit of switching itself off for no particular reason, so if my posts suddenly stop you'll know my laptop died). That left me with just the TV for entertainment. "Great!" I though. "America has produced Buffy, Angel, House, the Star Treks, Stargates and Dallas, so there's bound to be something worth watching."

49 channels and half-an-hour later I concluded that the adverts (and there were many, many of them and some were really quite bizarre) were better than the programmes. American TV is  terrible! We obviously get the cream of the crop imported, and my admiration for the BBC has gone up several levels.

So I was reduced to doing housework, and cleaned the apartment (including Hari and Gwen's room) extremely thoroughly before retiring to bed. Ceri climbed in with me which was lovely and we both drifted off to sleep. I was woken up by everyone arriving home an hour later. Ceri had wet the bed.

Everyone else version

Breakfast was lovely! A fruit salad I actually liked (fresh melon and pineapple) and cinnamon buns and eggs, bacon and sausages. All unlimited, with drinks too. We had a fun little tour in a golf cart, and since Brian went on so long we also got a free lunch - tortillas with three-bean chilli and nacho cheese sauce.

The American food in our cupboard. Note that we
bought nothing with any real nutritional value.

No complaints about sitting round the pool either, my own (ouch) sunburn notwithstanding. I could have been on the school run in the snow, or trying to keep on top of cleaning my house (cleaning the apartment was so much more fulfilling because it actually looked good at the end of it).

Admittedly I'm having a hard time putting a positive spin on a sick and soggy child but Suzy pointed out that at least we have a washing machine. Not just any old washing machine either. It takes a huge load (double what my machine at home can handle) and the cycle lasts about half-an-hour. My washing machine takes 1 hour 24 minutes to do a cycle. So we made up our bed just over an hour after Ceri had destroyed it.